Comrades in the fight against the menace that are olives, please, spare a moment to read the condition of the front lines, from the Captain of AoB cannon fodder.
My name is Droideka. I work as cannon fodder for the glorious AOB. I have seen the horrors of war, the horrors that olives have inflicted upon society. I have seen it at home, in various restaurants, and even at an awexome conference just this Summer (Baptists tried to poison me!). The fight is going well in parts of the upper Midwest, but in Italy, I'm afraid the presence of olives has taken a firm hold. Not that I've been there, but it has, it's what various intelligence officers told me at last week's Cannon Fodder meeting in Chile. You find a lot of olives on "pizza" in places such as New York. Luckily, though, in Chicago, home of REAL pizza, there are very few to be found, due to a barrage of Anti-Olive propaganda (We only have the napkin and the two posters, but still, it apparently works) and subliminal messaging.
Until later, peace out, my Anti-Olive homiez! (Or comrades, if you're particularly picky)
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4 comments:
Tsk tsk tsk. Members of the Anti-Olive Brigade do not refer to each other as 'homies'. They refer to each other as 'Comrades'.
Also, the napkin propaganda is the best. Anyone who says otherwise is a CLOSET OLIVE LOVER.
I did both. See the beginning? I felt particularly disturbing at the time.
True that. We need more napkins.
Something you haven't tried is Post-It propaganda, though.
The Baptists didn't attempt to poison you guys, though, did they? I remember there was a thing of olives on Monday night, the night you guys all deserted me and left me to roam Ridgecrest and climb walls.
Monday? I was sleeping in my bed at home on Monday...
Well, yeah, you just couldn't make it the day early so I would have someone to hang out with, and my group decided to go hiking (In the rain), so I walked around Ridgecrest and climbed up the stone walls that night.
I wish they had some of those around here... Those were fun.
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